


Witness

by Canon_Is_Relative



Category: The Queen's Thief - Megan Whalen Turner
Genre: Angst, Gen, Grieving, Loyalty, thick as thieves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-18 00:48:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11863161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Canon_Is_Relative/pseuds/Canon_Is_Relative
Summary: Philologos bears witness to the king's private grief.[Just a little treat for you, Florianschild, with my gratitude for your wonderful beta skills.]





	Witness

**Author's Note:**

  * For [florianschild](https://archiveofourown.org/users/florianschild/gifts).



Philologos had never heard a sound like the one that came from the king's dressing chamber on That Day.

A year ago he'd have sworn it came from a wild animal. Not so very long ago and he'd have suggested one of Sejanus's pranks.

Today, though, he could only stand with his arms wrapped around his middle, thinking that if his own pain seemed almost too great to bear that it was a wonder that this was all he was hearing from his king.

He wiped his cheeks again and tried to see past grief and panic and think what to _do_. In days past, he might have sent for Ornon, or for Costis. But they had both been sent away.

 _In days past,_ a nasty voice inside his head asked, _would you have cared?_

Yes, of course, was his answer, because his queen, his queen…

But the grief was threefold, now. His Queen, his King, and the little soul that had come before its time, and left by the same door.

"Philo," the king said, and Philo looked up to see him leaning heavily against the doorframe. He lifted his hand to indicate to Philo's eyes, the simple gesture looking like it cost him dearly. "What's all this?"

Philologos bowed his head as familiar but long-disused words sprang to his lips, bringing him unexpected comfort. He gave them voice, hoping that he might somehow pass some measure of that comfort on to his king. "As my body belongs to you, so do your joys and sorrows belong to me. O, My King…"

"Quoting the great poets at such a time?" Eugenides said, and his voice sounded as though he'd been reaching for a joke the way a falling man reaches for a handhold that isn't there. Philo kept his head bowed. A heavy hand fell on his shoulder. "Philologos. If you love her, do not speak of this."

Philo squeezed his eyes shut, and tried to understand. He had only just grown used to thinking of his queen as a mighty fortress set upon a cliff, and his king as the wave that crashed against her to prove her strength. But might not one ill-timed blow crumble even the mightiest rock and seem to prove the power of the sea and not the union of the two?

Philologos looked up and met his king's eyes. _For the love I bear for her and for you, I will not._ His lips would not open, so he simply nodded his head.

"That day and every day since then," he said later to Costis, the two of them walking in the garden, "I wish that I had said the words out loud to him."

Costis seemed changed, since his mysterious return from his mysterious errand, though Philo did not pretend to know him well enough to say in what way. He'd sought Costis out, as soon as the soldier's equally-mysterious business seemed to be squared away, and surprised him with a request that they might talk together somewhere away from sharp ears.

Costis was quiet for a long moment, then he stopped where two paths intersected and Philo looked up at him under the pretense of deciding on a direction.

"He knows," Costis said at last. "I'd wager that if you mean it, he already knows. And for what it's worth, I don't think your metaphor is quite right. The sea and the land, I mean. Our king may be unrelenting, but the sea doesn't know or care what it swallows up or destroys."

Philo kept looking at Costis until Costis met his eyes. _Changed, indeed._

"What did your friend mean," Philo asked as they headed back toward the courtyard. "When he called Eugenides _Annux_?"

Costis stiffened. "He is not my friend, I don't pretend to know what was going through his head at the time."

Philo focused on the thought that Hilarion would have been proud of him, to see how little he reacted to such an unforcasted change in demeanour. Hilarion's advice to focus instead on some tangential but unremarkable piece of information – to keep your thoughts both centred and distant – had been invaluable.

"Will you be rejoining the guard?" Philo asked, as they approached the arched entry to the courtyard.

"No," Costis told him, hand coming halfway to his hip as though to brush the hilt of a sword that wasn’t there.

They parted ways with amiable nods, as though they had simply happened to meet while enjoying a quiet hour off-duty.

 

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoy my writing, I'd be thrilled if you'd take a minute to check out my original fiction. My first novel, 'Portrait of a Stranger,' is a sweet story of three chance encounters, two boys, and first love. Co-written with my fic-writing partner stardust_made, it will be released on December 26, 2018. You can order it [HERE](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07KVLWHF6/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1543166018&sr=1-1&keywords=Portrait+of+a+Stranger).
> 
> The first few chapters are available to read [here on our blog](https://leboncanon.wordpress.com/). We appreciate the support of our fellow fanpeople!


End file.
